“With A Song In My Heart” – Some Tips, For Living A Happy Life, From A Guy Who’s Living A Happy Life!
Happiness is a choice, and a very personal one, at that. There are lots and lots of books and videos, by all kinds of experts, from many different fields of study...all about happiness. In the end, even after consuming them all, it is still up to you, to decide what happiness is, and how you can experience it. These experts are doing exactly what you are doing. They are discovering what happiness is, and how to live in happiness. The only difference is…they have figured out how to make it their job. I know. I am one of those people. I love my work.
For more than twenty years, I have had the great honor of helping others, in their remembering. Wait. What? Let me back up a little. I believe that we are all already whole, and that all healing is simply the remembering that we are already whole. I know my clients and students as whole, while also realizing that they may not be fully experiencing themselves in this way. Part of this work, is to help them see that happiness is a choice, that it can be a conscious choice, and that they are always free to choose happiness, regardless of their current experience.
Our happiness is only dependent on our decision to experience it. This takes practice. I know, because it is my daily, all day long, practice. I practice what I teach, and I teach what I practice. When I was approached about writing an article on happiness, for this amazing publication, I had just been interviewed, to potentially be in a book about fifty of the happiest people on Earth (according to one well-known self-help/spiritual author), and this had inspired me to start writing material for my own book, of tips for living a happy life.
Now, I get to share some of these with you. As always, trust yourself, above all, and should you find some wisdom in these tips, remember that it is simply your own wisdom, reflected back to you. Thank you for the opportunity to connect and share with you. Here’s to your happiness!
1. “Cause I’m easy. Easy, like a Sunday morning.” – Be easy with yourself...about everything...no matter what. Be easy. Cut yourself slack...a lot of it. Be gentle and generous with yourself. Be kind to yourself. Be easy even when it feels more make-believe than real…even when you don’t feel like you deserve it. Be courageous, in your decision to be easy with yourself. This is a practice, to be sure. You may feel some of the old feelings of guilt and disappointment. Say “Hi!” to them, and then come right back to being easy. Happy people are easy with themselves, and easy with others. Which brings us to our next tip.
2. “Free To Be You and Me” – Be easy with the people, in your life. This is another practice of happy people. They’re easygoing folks, because they have chosen to be easy with others too. Be easy with folks, no matter what. Cut them slack…a lot of it. Be gentle and generous with others. Be kind, too. Be easy with them, even when it feels like make-believe (or even an outright lie). Does this all sound familiar? You know this one. The people, in your life, are mirrors for you. Being easy, with them, is being easy with yourself. This is a challenge, at first, and sometimes we may not remember to be easy. No worries. This brings us to our next tip.
3. “But I think it's about forgiveness…” – When you find that you haven’t been easy with yourself or with others, forgive yourself, and while you’re at it, forgive others too. It’s like being easy, but with a time delay. It’s retro-active easiness. It’s like time travel, and since time and space are constructs, you have no excuse, really. So…have at it. Forgive, with wild abandon. Make it a hobby. (“What do you do?” “Me? I’m doing the whole forgiveness thing. You know.”). Forgive yourself, and others…ALL THE TIME, and ABOUT EVERYTHING. Was that too subtle? This is a big one. Self-forgiveness is self-healing, and all healing is simply the remembering that we are already whole.
4. “Welcome to my happiness. You know it makes me smile.” – Celebrate the joy and happiness of others, with great fervor. Revel in their successes and triumphs. Make their good news be your good news, and really let yourself feel the excitement of it. This is a powerful way to jumpstart, or reconnect, with our own happiness. Now, we are not responsible for making others happy, but happy people do love celebrating the happiness of others. Happy people make others’ happiness, their own, AND love sharing their happiness with others.
5. “I love to laugh…hahahaha…loud and long and clear…” – This ain’t news, but…laughter makes us feel good. It is, perhaps, the most holistic activity, available to us…if not the best medicine (see above), it is near the top…with benefits in every area of our lives. Laughter makes for happy people. We know this, because we’ve experienced it. We don’t need research to tell us this, but serious research (see what I did there?) keeps confirming this as true. It also confirms another cool truth. You get all the benefits, whether you wait for something to make you laugh, or you choose to laugh, just for the sake of laughing. Laughter Yoga is an amazing practice, that taps into this understanding, and makes it available to everyone. Find a Laughter Yoga club, in your area…they’re everywhere…or contact me about creating your own laughter practice. (Yep, that was a plug, but a soft one, eh? )
6. “Sing. Sing a song…” – Sing and whistle and hum happy tunes…and tunes that make you feel happy. Sing to yourself, or out loud. May I suggest that, even if you count yourself as shy, you allow yourself to belt out at least one tune a day? It has many of the same researched benefits as laughter, actually, and is another completely holistic activity that costs nothing and requires no special set-up. Also, as the song goes, “Don’t worry if it’s not good enough, for anyone else to hear. Just sing. Sing a song.” Sing in the car, in the shower, with the vacuum on…if you are self-conscious of your voice…but do sing. It’s brilliant! Sing happy tunes, uplifting tunes, hopeful tunes, tunes that make you feel like dancing. Which brings us to our next tip.
7. “I like to move it, move it. I like to move it, move it.” – Get on up, and move that body of yours. Dance and play and walk and run and hike and bike and swim and juggle and parkour and bounce on trampolines and hang-glide and stomp grapes and do some tai chi and yoga and throw your hands in the air, like you just don’t care and have sex and hug people and wave at people and… You get the idea, right? The human body loves to move. It is built for it. A moving body is a happy body, and happy bodies belong to happy people. Really. Truly. You know this. You could be dancing while you read this. (hint, hint)
8. “Cause the things that I prize, like the stars in the sky, are all free.” – Make a practice of taking in delight in simple things, in everyday things. Find the miracle in the mundane. Pay attention to the brilliance and the majesty of your current surroundings. In fact, let’s do this, right now. Close your eyes and take a couple of deep breaths. Then, look around, and do your best to allow yourself to be amazed at it all. Think about it, for just one moment…this computer is incredible. You and I can connect through time and space, and it is all so easy. And that’s just the most obvious example. Allow yourself to be amazed and astounded. Happy people find things to be happy about.
9. “The Sound Of Silence” and “Every Breath You Take” – This one is very simple. Make time, every day, to be still and quiet. Notice I didn’t use meditation? Sometimes, that word can scare people off. If you want to meditate, and call it meditation…wonderful! It works just as well, if you call it “making time to be quiet and still”. Either way, this is the one practice that I introduce to every single client and student. The happiest people, I have ever met (and I have met a lot, in just the last twenty years), have made time for being quiet and being still. I could go and on, but you get it. Why? Because you are very smart and very wise.
10. “I go to sleep, counting my blessings” – Make your last thoughts be about all things you can count as blessing…practice gratitude as a bedtime ritual. It can help you frame your dreams, and set the tone for the next day. Grateful people are happy people. It is really simple. Bless your world, and you live in a world of blessing. This is just good psychology. You will experience your world in the way that you expect to experience it. See it as blessing, and it is. It is this simple, and with some practice, it is this easy.
11. “Always Something There To Remind Me” – One last one. Whether you are beginning to cultivate your practice of happiness, or renewing it, consider an old tried and true memory tool. Leave yourself notes…all over the place, and in bright colors. Leave them in conspicuous places. The bathroom mirror is a great place. So is the ceiling above your bed, and the dash of your car. I leave them everywhere, and I even hide them, so that I can have wonderful little surprises, later on. I’m sure you already have some ideas of your own ideas. Make the message simple, like “Smile, beautiful!” or “Remember, happiness is a choice.” or “Quick! Name three things you love!” You could even use song lyrics, like I’ve done for this article. Whatever works for you, is what works.
Thank you, my friends! This has been a blast. If you would like to stay connected with me, friend me on Facebook. I have a fairly new professional page, and a standard personal page. I am slowly moving most of my activity to the professional page, but I accept friends, at either one. Search for Patrick Sterenchuk. Trust me. There is only one person with that name. You can also follow me on Twitter, @brotherpatrick. When you connect, please let me know that we met through this article. Thank you. I look forward to it. Now… Quick! Name three things you love!
Patrick Sterenchuk is a spiritual teacher, mentor, life coach, healer, intuitive, meditation teacher, stress management consultant, and Certified Teacher of Laughter Yoga. His work is informed by his deep and abiding belief that all healing is simply the remembering that we are all already whole. For more than twenty years, he has had the great honor of serving others, all over the world, in their remembering. You can find Patrick on Facebook, and by following him on Twitter, @brotherpatrick. A website is in the works.
Patrick was recently interviewed, by a well-known self-help/spiritual author, to be included in a book about the happiest people in the world. That book is now out, and is called “Happy Stories”, by International Best Selling author, Will Bowen. It is available on Kindle, and at all fine booksellers (ask your local independent book seller).
